As you probably know, Nadya Suleman is the woman in California who recently have birth to octuplets. Typically, when a family has experience a large multiple birth, there is an outpouring of support from the public. This has not been the case for Nadya. In fact, a recent survey by USA Today showed that only 25% of people were sympathetic.

Nadya says that she is being unfairly criticized because she is a single mother. Is this true?

In a word, no. There are a couple of aspects to her situation that would turn people off, regardless of the marital status of the parents.

Lack of honesty

Nadya’s original story does not seem to be holding up. She originally said that she was going to raise the octuplets (and their six siblings) on her own and would not be on welfare.

Later, media outlets found out that she is receiving SSI benefits and food stamps for some of the six older children.

Then we found out that the hospital was requesting reimbursement from the state of California.

Then we saw the website requesting donations from the public. (I have made a conscious decision not to provide a link to the web site.)

Is this your definition of raising kids on your own?

If she didn’t walk to speak to the media, that would have been fine. But once she starts talking to the media, there is the expectation of honesty.

Apparent disregard for others

Nadya’s other six children are all between the ages of 2 and 7. At an age where kids need a lot of attention from their caregivers (apparently Nadya and her parents, in this case), there was already a lot of competition for the attention of the caregivers. At this point, Nadya chose to have eight eggs implanted, guaranteeing a situation where the kids would have to fight even more for attention.

Nadya’s parents are ten months behind on her mortgage payments and face foreclosure. For those of you who are good at math, you would realize that they were behind on payments at the time the eggs were implanted. I guess it is possible – but probably not likely – that Nadya is not receiving financial support from her parents (meaning that she wouldn’t be the direct cause of the financial trouble). However, she and her fourteen kids are living with her parents. This means that Nadya’s parents really don’t have the option of downsizing to a smaller house. I feel bad for her parents, as they are in a very awkward position. If the foreclosure goes through, a family of sixteen could be homeless.

It simply seems that Nadya may not have been considering the best interests of her children or her parents.

I hope I am wrong …

I really hope that Nadya does find success in her career field when she finished college. I also hope that the fourteen kids all have strong, positive relationships with their mother. Unfortunately, I am a bit pessimistic about that possibility.

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Kosmo is the founder of The Soap Boxers and writes on a variety of topics. Many of his short stories have been collected into Kindle books.

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